What Happens in Premarital Counseling? A Guide for Couples Thinking About the Future

Strong relationships don’t just happen they’re built with intention, communication, and support. That’s where premarital counseling comes in. It’s not about fixing something that’s broken. It’s about making sure your relationship has a strong foundation before stress, miscommunication, or unmet expectations start to wear it down.

Premarital Counseling gives couples a structured, supportive space to explore important topics that don’t always come up in everyday conversation. It's not about searching for problems—it's about avoiding assumptions and creating clarity before committing to a shared future.

In fact, research shows this kind of preparation works.
A meta-analysis of premarital education programs found that couples who participate reduce their risk of divorce by 31%. That’s not luck—it’s the power of preparation.

And here's the key: the issues most likely to cause long-term conflict or divorce—like poor communication, financial disagreements, or misaligned values—are often completely preventable with the right tools and conversations early on.

Is Premarital Counseling a Red Flag?

Not at all—premarital counseling is actually a sign of a healthy, intentional relationship.
Choosing to start therapy before marriage isn’t about finding problems—it’s about preparing for real life before you’re in the thick of it. It shows that you and your partner are serious about building a strong, lasting foundation.

In fact, couples who invest in premarital therapy are often better equipped to handle stress, communicate effectively, and navigate life transitions together. It’s not a red flag. It’s a green light.

Premarital counseling gives couples the structure to have conversations they may not even realize they need to have. Instead of avoiding big topics or hoping things "just work out," you're creating shared understanding, clear expectations, and tools to manage conflict when it does arise.

What Questions Do They Ask in Premarital Counseling?

During premarital counseling sessions, you’ll talk through topics that many couples assume they agree on—until something comes up later. With guidance, you’ll explore not just what you want, but how you each handle differences in areas like:

• Communication styles and how you respond to conflict

• Expectations around marriage, partnership, and support

• Core values, beliefs, and family backgrounds

• Finances: spending, saving, debt, and financial planning

• Children and parenting: Do you want kids? How many? When?

• How each of you handles stress, pressure, and decision-making

• Sex and intimacy: needs, boundaries, and comfort

• Roles and responsibilities in the relationship

• Time apart, autonomy, and boundaries with family or friends

These questions aren’t meant to stir up conflict—they’re meant to prevent it. They help identify areas of misalignment early so you can work through them together, with clarity and support.

Because the truth is:

“We’ll figure it out” works—until it doesn’t.

Premarital counseling helps you figure it out now, before assumptions or misunderstandings become long-term tension. It’s not about problems—it’s about proactive, compassionate preparation. It gives you the structure to talk through these issues clearly, with guidance, so you’re not improvising important life decisions under pressure.

Should You Be Engaged for Premarital Counseling?

No—you don’t need to be engaged to start premarital counseling.
In fact, some of the most powerful sessions happen before a proposal, when couples are exploring whether they’re ready to take that next step.

Premarital counseling isn’t about wedding logistics—it’s about relationship clarity. It’s for any couple thinking seriously about long-term commitment and wanting to make sure they’re aligned on big-picture values, goals, and expectations.

Even if everything feels good now, therapy creates space to talk about what might come up later—like how you handle conflict, make decisions, navigate family boundaries, or plan your future together.

For some couples, premarital therapy confirms their readiness. For others, it highlights important differences that need more attention. Either way, it’s a sign of care, intention, and emotional maturity—not a checkbox after you book a venue.

How Far in Advance Should You Do Premarital Counseling?

Ideally, you’ll begin therapy when you’re having real conversations about the future—not just picking out floral arrangements.

Start when you’re asking questions like:

• Are we aligned in our values and goals?

• How do we handle stress or conflict?

• What are our expectations for marriage, kids, or money?

Premarital therapy helps you prepare for the emotional side of commitment—not just the logistics of a wedding day. When couples say, “We’ll figure it out,” what they often mean is, “We hope this works itself out.” Sometimes it does. But often, unspoken differences uncover over time.

By starting early, you give yourselves the time and space to work through differences with clarity—not pressure. Even couples who feel completely in sync often uncover blind spots they hadn’t considered.

Don’t wait until stress is high and time is short.
Start premarital counseling when the conversation is about your relationship—not your guest list.

Want to get started?
We offer relaxed, judgment-free premarital counseling in Montclair, NJ and NY to help couples build a strong foundation for marriage. Whether you feel totally aligned or just want to make sure you're on the same page, our sessions create space for real, meaningful conversations.

Schedule your premarital therapy session today and take the next step toward a healthy, lasting relationship.

What Percentage of Couples Stay Together After Couples Therapy?

Couples therapy has long been a resource for partners looking to strengthen their relationships, improve communication, and resolve conflicts. But how effective is it? Do most couples actually stay together after therapy, or is it just a temporary fix?

If you’re considering couples counseling in New Jersey , New York or anywhere else, you might be wondering—what are the chances therapy will help us stay together?

Let’s break down the research, the factors that influence success, and what you can do to make couples therapy work for your relationship.

Success Rates of Couples Therapy

Studies show that couples therapy works for most people—but not all. The effectiveness depends on several factors, including the couple’s commitment, the therapist’s approach, and how early they seek help.

General Effectiveness of Couples Therapy

• About 70% of couples report significant improvements in their relationship after therapy.¹

• Roughly 38–50% of couples are still together four years after therapy. Even among those who separate, many still report better communication and greater understanding.²

• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) shows particularly strong results. Meta-analysis indicates a 70–75% success rate, with 90% of couples reporting measurable improvement.³

While not every couple stays together after therapy, most do experience better communication, fewer conflicts, and greater relationship satisfaction.

Why Do Some Couples Stay Together and Others Don’t?

Couples therapy isn’t a magic fix—it requires effort from both partners. The couples who stay together after therapy tend to have:

✅ A willingness to change – Both partners actively work on their relationship, not just expect the therapist to “fix” things.
✅ Commitment to the process – They attend sessions regularly and apply what they learn outside of therapy.
✅ A strong foundation – Even if things are rocky, couples who still respect and value each other have a better chance of staying together.
✅ Early intervention – The sooner couples seek help, the more likely therapy is to work.

On the other hand, therapy is less likely to work if:

❌ One or both partners are unwilling to change.
❌ There’s ongoing dishonesty, infidelity, or deep resentment.
❌ Therapy is a last resort after years of unresolved issues.

The reality is, some couples realize they are better apart. And that’s not always a failure—sometimes, therapy helps partners separate in a healthy way rather than in a painful, drawn-out battle.

The Importance of Early Intervention

Couples often wait too long to get help. On average, couples wait 2.68 years after noticing serious problems before starting therapy ⁴ . And by then, many habits are deeply ingrained.

Starting earlier allows partners to untangle patterns before resentment hardens. But some issues—like long-term emotional distance, frequent conflict, or broken trust—need more time and support.

In those cases, successful outcomes typically involve:

• Extended therapeutic engagement – Longer timelines to rebuild trust and healthy communication

• Consistent effort from both partners – Therapy only works if both people do

• Specialized approaches – Methods like EFT or the Gottman Method can be especially effective for deeper challenges

Early is better. But it’s never too late—as long as both people are willing to show up and do the work.

While early intervention is beneficial, it's crucial to recognize that some challenges require sustained effort and specialized approaches to overcome.

How to Make Couples Therapy Work for You

If you and your partner are considering therapy, here’s how to get the most out of it:

1. Be Open and Honest

Therapy only works if both partners are willing to be vulnerable and share their true feelings. Holding back or avoiding difficult conversations can prevent real progress.

2. Choose the Right Therapist

Not all therapists are the same. Look for someone who specializes in couples counseling and whose approach resonates with both of you. Some of the most effective methods include:

• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) – Helps couples rebuild emotional connection.

• Gottman Method – Focuses on communication and conflict resolution.

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) – Helps couples change negative thought patterns.

3. Commit to the Process

Therapy isn’t a one-time fix—it requires consistent effort. This means:
✔ Attending sessions regularly.
✔ Doing any exercises or homework outside of therapy.
✔ Practicing new communication strategies daily.

4. Take Responsibility for Your Role

It’s easy to blame your partner, but therapy works best when both people acknowledge their part in the relationship dynamics.

5. Apply What You Learn

Therapy is not just about talking—it’s about learning skills that improve your relationship. Practice those skills in real life:
✔ Use active listening techniques.
✔ Try different conflict resolution strategies.
✔ Be intentional about reconnecting with your partner.

Final Thoughts: Does Couples Therapy Help Couples Stay Together?

Yes—for most couples, therapy improves their relationship. Studies show that a majority of couples who seek therapy experience positive changes, and many stay together long-term.

However, therapy isn’t about forcing a relationship to survive—it’s about helping partners make the best choice for their future. Some couples come out stronger than ever, while others separate in a way that’s healthier and less painful.

If you’re struggling in your relationship, seeking therapy sooner rather than later can make all the difference. Whether you want to work through challenges, improve communication, or reconnect with your partner, couples therapy can be a powerful tool for building a healthier, happier relationship.

Considering Couples Therapy in New Jersey?

At Bridging Bonds, we provide expert couples counseling near Montclair, NJ, helping partners strengthen their connection and navigate challenges together.

Sources:
¹ “Is It Time to Go to Couples Counseling?” The Gottman Institute, 27 Feb. 2020. www.gottman.com/blog/is-it-time-to-go-to-couples-counseling.
² Ibid.
³ Spengler, P. M., Lee, N. A., Wiebe, S. A., & Wittenborn, A. K. (2024). A comprehensive meta-analysis on the efficacy of emotionally focused couple therapy. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice, 13(2), 81–99. https://doi.org/10.1037/cfp0000233

⁴ Doherty, W. J., Harris, S. M., Hall, E. L., & Hubbard, A. K. (2021). How long do people wait before seeking couples therapy? A research note. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 47(4), 882–890. https://doi.org/10.1111/jmft.12479

How Often Should You Go to Couples Therapy?

When you first start couples therapy, it might feel like you have a long road ahead—kind of like going to the gym for the first time or recovering from an injury with physical therapy. At first, you may need consistent effort, structured sessions, and expert guidance to build better habits. Over time, though, the process shifts—it’s less about fixing problems and more about maintaining a healthy relationship.

So, how often should you go to couples therapy? The answer depends on where you are in your relationship and what you need from therapy. Let’s break it down.

Couples Therapy is Like Going to the Gym

Think about the last time you committed to a fitness goal. In the beginning, you probably had to:

🏋️ Show up regularly to build strength and endurance.
🥗 Make major adjustments to your routine, like eating healthier or changing your habits.
⏳ Put in the work before you saw results.

Couples therapy works the same way. At first, you may need frequent sessions to break old patterns and build new, healthier relationship habits. But once you gain the right tools and skills, you won’t need therapy as often—it becomes more about maintaining a healthy balance, just like staying active after reaching a fitness goal.

How Often Should You Go?

The frequency of couples therapy depends on a few factors:

✅ Are you facing serious challenges?
✅ Do you and your partner struggle with communication?
✅ Are you in crisis mode, or are you looking for general relationship maintenance?

Here’s a general guideline for how often to attend:

🏃 Phase 1: Starting Out (Weekly Sessions)

🗓 1x per week for the first 8-12 weeks

At the beginning of therapy, you and your partner are learning new skills, breaking unhealthy patterns, and working through deeper issues. Weekly sessions provide:

✔ Consistent progress and accountability.
✔ A safe space to navigate conflicts in real time.
✔ Stronger relationship muscles—just like starting a gym routine.

For couples in crisis or dealing with serious challenges like infidelity, trust issues, or constant fighting, twice-a-week sessions may be necessary in the first month or two.

💪 Phase 2: Strengthening the Relationship (Biweekly Sessions)

🗓 Every other week for the next 2-4 months

Once couples start improving their communication, conflict resolution, and emotional connection, therapy shifts from crisis management to relationship strengthening.

✔ Less frequent sessions allow you to practice new skills independently.
✔ You’re still checking in and making adjustments with your therapist.
✔ More space between sessions means you can see how well your relationship tools are working in everyday life.

🏡 Phase 3: Maintenance Mode (Monthly Sessions or As Needed)

🗓 1x per month or only when needed

At this stage, couples therapy becomes like maintaining a healthy lifestyle—it’s not about fixing problems, but about staying strong together. Think of it like a personal trainer you see occasionally to keep your fitness on track.

✔ You’ve learned how to resolve conflicts on your own.
✔ You’re maintaining healthy communication habits.
✔ You check in with your therapist only when needed—maybe every few months or once a year for a relationship "tune-up."

Some couples never stop therapy entirely—they use it like a "gym membership" for their relationship, checking in when life gets stressful or when they need an emotional reset.

Can You Take a Break From Therapy?

Yes! Once you and your partner feel confident applying what you’ve learned, you can pause sessions and return as needed. But just like stopping workouts or eating unhealthy for too long, ignoring your relationship health for months or years can lead to issues creeping back in.

Consider returning to therapy if:

⚠ You find yourselves falling into old patterns of arguing or miscommunication.
⚠ A major life event or stressor puts pressure on your relationship (moving, having a baby, job changes, etc.).
⚠ You feel disconnected and need a structured way to rebuild intimacy.

Think of therapy as a lifelong tool, not a one-time fix.

Final Thoughts: How Often Should You Go to Couples Therapy?

Just like building physical strength or recovering from an injury, improving your relationship takes time, effort, and consistency. At first, therapy may require weekly sessions to rebuild trust, fix communication issues, and resolve conflicts. Over time, though, it becomes more about maintenance—checking in occasionally to keep your relationship healthy and strong.

Every couple’s journey is different, so the best frequency depends on your needs, goals, and relationship history. What matters most is putting in the effort, practicing what you learn, and making your relationship a priority.

Need Couples Therapy in New Jersey?

At Bridging Bonds, we offer expert couples counseling near Montclair, NJ, helping partners strengthen their connection and navigate challenges together.

Does Couples Therapy Mean the Relationship Is Over?

Many couples hesitate before starting therapy because they fear it’s the beginning of the end. There’s a common misconception that going to couples counseling is a last-ditch effort—a desperate move before calling it quits. But here’s the truth:

Couples therapy isn’t about ending a relationship—it’s about finding clarity.

Sometimes, therapy helps couples rebuild a strong, lasting connection. Other times, it provides a peaceful and respectful way to separate when staying together isn’t the best path forward. Either way, therapy is about growth, healing, and making the healthiest choice for both people involved.

So, does going to therapy mean your relationship is over? Not at all. In fact, it might be the best thing you ever do for your relationship—whether you stay together or not.

Therapy Isn’t Just for “Broken” Relationships

Many people assume couples therapy is only for marriages on the brink of divorce, but that’s far from true. Therapy is beneficial for couples at all stages of their relationship, including:

✅ Couples wanting to strengthen communication before marriage.
✅ Partners feeling disconnected but wanting to rebuild intimacy.
✅ Couples facing external stressors (work, family, financial struggles).
✅ Those considering separation but wanting to part on good terms.

Couples therapy is not a sign of failure—it’s a sign that both people care enough about their relationship to explore solutions and make an informed decision together.

When Therapy Helps You Stay Together

For many couples, therapy strengthens their bond rather than ending it. When both partners are committed, counseling can:

✔ Improve communication so small issues don’t turn into major fights.
✔ Rebuild trust after breaches like infidelity or dishonesty.
✔ Resolve lingering resentment so both partners feel valued.
✔ Strengthen emotional and physical intimacy through deeper understanding.

Many couples come into therapy feeling hopeless, only to leave feeling reconnected, respected, and ready to move forward together.

When Therapy Helps You Separate Peacefully

On the other hand, not every relationship is meant to last forever—and that’s okay. Some couples realize through therapy that parting ways is the best decision for their happiness, but that doesn’t mean therapy failed.

Therapy helps couples separate in a way that is:

❤️ Respectful – Instead of a bitter breakup, therapy allows for open conversations about why the relationship isn’t working and what each person needs moving forward.

❤️ Less Painful – Therapy provides closure, helping both people process their emotions so they can move on in a healthy way.

❤️ Beneficial for Co-Parenting – If children are involved, therapy teaches parents how to transition from partners to co-parents, keeping the focus on their children’s well-being.

Separating doesn’t always have to be a battle. Therapy can help couples end a relationship with mutual understanding and kindness, rather than anger and regret.

Does Going to Therapy Mean You’ve Failed?

Absolutely not. In fact, seeking therapy is one of the most responsible and mature things a couple can do.

A relationship isn’t only successful if it lasts forever. Success can also mean:

✨ Learning valuable lessons about yourself and your partner.
✨ Discovering how to set healthy boundaries in future relationships.
✨ Moving forward without resentment or bitterness.

Whether you stay together or not, therapy helps you leave with clarity, respect, and peace of mind.

Final Thoughts: Does Couples Therapy Mean the Relationship Is Over?

No—couples therapy is not an automatic ending. It’s a tool that helps couples decide the best path forward—together.

For many, therapy strengthens the relationship and creates a deeper, healthier connection. For others, it provides a way to separate with grace, understanding, and mutual respect.

Either way, couples therapy is about growth, healing, and making the best choice for both people involved.

Considering Couples Therapy in New Jersey?

At Bridging Bonds, we provide expert couples counseling near Montclair, NJ, helping partners strengthen their relationship or navigate a peaceful transition when necessary.

Is Couples Counseling Worth It?

If you and your partner are struggling with communication, conflict, or disconnection, you may be wondering—is couples counseling really worth it?

For some, therapy might seem like a last resort. Others may question whether it actually works or if it’s just “paying to talk about feelings.” But the truth is, couples therapy is one of the most effective ways to strengthen relationships, improve communication, and resolve long-standing issues.

So, is couples counseling worth it? Let’s break it down.

Does Couples Counseling Actually Work?

Yes—for most couples, therapy helps improve their relationship. Research shows that:

• 70% of couples who attend therapy report a significant improvement in their relationship (https://blog.opencounseling.com/does-marriage-counseling-work/).

• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), one of the most common methods, has a success rate of 70-75%, with 90% of couples showing noticeable improvements (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mindful-relationships/202101/the-most-effective-couples-therapy-by-far).

While not every couple stays together, most couples leave therapy with better communication skills, deeper understanding, and healthier ways to handle conflict.

How Can Couples Therapy Help?

Couples counseling isn’t just about fixing broken relationships—it’s about learning skills that can prevent problems from escalating and improving an already strong relationship. Here’s what therapy can do:

✅ 1. Improve Communication

One of the biggest reasons couples struggle is because of miscommunication or lack of communication altogether. Therapy helps you:
✔ Learn how to express yourself clearly without conflict.
✔ Understand your partner’s needs, fears, and concerns more deeply.
✔ Develop listening skills that make both partners feel heard and valued.

✅ 2. Help Resolve Recurring Conflicts

Many couples argue about the same things over and over without reaching a resolution. Therapy helps break the cycle by:
✔ Identifying the root cause of repeated arguments.
✔ Providing neutral guidance so both partners feel understood.
✔ Teaching healthy conflict resolution techniques instead of resorting to blame, yelling, or shutting down.

✅ 3. Rebuild Trust and Strengthen Connection

For couples experiencing trust issues, infidelity, or emotional distance, therapy can:
✔ Offer a safe space to rebuild trust and reconnect.
✔ Help both partners understand their emotional needs better.
✔ Provide tools for rebuilding intimacy and security in the relationship.

✅ 4. Prevent Small Issues from Becoming Bigger Problems

Many couples wait too long before seeking therapy. In fact, studies show that most couples wait an average of six years after issues arise before getting help (https://blog.opencounseling.com/does-marriage-counseling-work/).

Seeking therapy early can help:
✔ Address small frustrations before they turn into major resentments.
✔ Build better relationship habits to prevent future conflicts.
✔ Give couples the tools to handle challenges together, rather than against each other.

When is Couples Therapy NOT Worth It?

While therapy can be incredibly helpful, it’s not a magic fix for every relationship. Couples therapy may not be effective if:

❌ One or both partners refuse to participate – Therapy requires effort from both people. If one partner is unwilling to engage, the progress will be limited.

❌ There is ongoing abuse – If the relationship is physically or emotionally abusive, therapy may not be the safest option. Seeking individual counseling first is often recommended.

❌ One or both partners have already emotionally checked out – If someone has already decided to leave, therapy might help provide closure but may not save the relationship.

Is Couples Therapy Worth the Cost?

A common concern is whether couples counseling is worth the money. While therapy is an investment, consider this:

💰 Divorce is expensive – The average divorce in the U.S. costs $7,000 - $15,000 per person. Investing in therapy could save tens of thousands of dollars in legal fees, relocation, and divided assets.

💰 Mental health & stress impact daily life – Relationship stress affects your health, work performance, and overall happiness. Therapy can help reduce stress and improve emotional well-being.

💰 A strong relationship is priceless – The cost of therapy is small compared to the value of a happy, fulfilling partnership. If therapy helps you stay together and build a healthier relationship, it’s worth every penny.

Final Thoughts: Is Couples Therapy Worth It?

Absolutely—for couples who are committed to improving their relationship, therapy is one of the best investments they can make.

Whether you’re struggling with communication, trust, or recurring conflicts, couples counseling provides the tools and guidance to navigate challenges together. Even if your relationship is going well, therapy can help strengthen your bond and prevent future issues.

If you’re on the fence, ask yourself:
❓ Do we argue about the same things without resolving them?
❓ Do we struggle to communicate effectively?
❓ Do we feel disconnected or distant from each other?
❓ Do we want to build a stronger foundation for the future?

If you answered yes to any of these, couples counseling is definitely worth it.

Considering Couples Therapy in New Jersey?

At Bridging Bonds, we specialize in couples counseling near Montclair, NJ, helping partners strengthen their connection and navigate challenges together.

Is Marriage Counseling Covered by Insurance?

The short answer? Kind of.

Marriage counseling may or may not be covered by insurance, depending on your provider, your plan, and how the therapy is billed. Unlike individual therapy, which insurance companies often recognize as essential mental health care, couples counseling is not always viewed the same way.

While some plans do offer partial coverage, insurance companies tend to prioritize individual therapy over relationship-based counseling—which means couples often end up paying more out of pocket.

Let’s break down how insurance works for marriage counseling and what you can do to find affordable options.

Why Doesn’t Insurance Fully Cover Marriage Counseling?

Most insurance companies base coverage on medical necessity—meaning they cover treatments for diagnosable mental health conditions like depression, anxiety, or PTSD. Since relationship issues are not classified as medical conditions, many insurers don’t see marriage counseling as essential care.

That said, some plans cover couples therapy if it’s tied to an individual mental health diagnosis. That means one person has to carry a diagnosis. For example:

✅ If one partner has a diagnosed condition (like depression, anxiety, or PTSD), insurance may cover therapy if the sessions are focused on that partner’s treatment—even if relationship issues are also discussed.

✅ If your therapist is licensed in-network or if you have out of network benefits, some insurance plans offer partial reimbursement for couples therapy.

However, if therapy is solely for relationship support ( e.g. to address communication difficulties, betrayal, conflict management), insurance companies typically won’t cover it, considering it a personal expense rather than a medical necessity.

How to Check If Your Insurance Covers Marriage Counseling

If you want to see if your insurance will cover couples therapy, here’s what to do:

1. Call Your Insurance Provider

Ask these questions:

• Does my plan cover couples therapy or marriage counseling?

• What are the requirements for coverage? (Do we need a mental health diagnosis?)

• Are there in-network providers who offer couples therapy?

• How many sessions are covered per year?

• What is my copay or out-of-pocket cost?

2. Ask Your Therapist

Some therapists offer insurance-friendly billing options, such as:

✔ Using a mental health diagnosis to qualify for in network coverage or out of network reimbursement
✔ Providing superbills (detailed invoices) if using out of network benefits that you can submit for partial reimbursement.
✔ Offering sliding scale fees if insurance won’t cover therapy.

3. Look for EAP (Employee Assistance Program) Benefits

Some workplaces offer free or discounted couples therapy as part of their Employee Assistance Program (EAP). Check with your HR department to see if this is available.

How Much Does Marriage Counseling Cost Without Insurance?

Since insurance coverage for couples therapy is limited, many couples pay out of pocket. In New Jersey, the average cost of marriage counseling ranges from $150 to $320 per session.

Factors that influence cost include:
💰 Therapist’s experience – More experienced therapists often charge more.
💰 Session length – Some therapists offer longer, more intensive sessions at higher rates.
💰 Location – Urban areas tend to have higher costs than suburban or rural locations.

Is Paying for Marriage Counseling Worth It?

Even if your insurance doesn’t cover couples therapy, it’s still one of the best investments you can make in your relationship.

Consider this:
💡 Divorce costs thousands of dollars in legal fees, mediation, and asset division. Therapy is often more affordable in the long run.
💡 Emotional well-being matters. Relationship stress affects mental health, work performance, and daily happiness.
💡 Prevention is key. Addressing small problems before they become major issues can save your relationship from long-term struggles.

If cost is a concern, many therapists offer sliding scale pricing to make counseling more affordable.

Final Thoughts: Will Insurance Cover Marriage Counseling?

Maybe—but not always.

🔹 If therapy is tied to a mental health diagnosis, some insurance plans offer partial coverage.
🔹 If it’s strictly for relationship support, insurance likely won’t cover it.
🔹 Checking with your provider and therapist is the best way to determine your options.

Even if you have to pay out of pocket, couples therapy is often worth the investment—helping you and your partner strengthen your relationship, improve communication, and build a healthier future together.

Considering Couples Therapy in New Jersey?

At Bridging Bonds, we provide expert couples counseling near Montclair, NJ, helping partners strengthen their relationship or navigate a peaceful transition when necessary.

How Much Does Couples Therapy Cost in New Jersey?

Couples therapy is a valuable resource for partners seeking to strengthen their relationship, improve communication, and resolve conflicts. If you're considering couples counseling in New Jersey, understanding the associated costs can help you plan accordingly.

Average Cost of Couples Therapy in New Jersey

The cost of couples therapy in New Jersey varies based on several factors, including the therapist's specialization, experience, location, and the length of sessions. On average, couples can expect to pay between $150 to $320 per session.

Source: anxietybhp.com

It's important to note that these rates can vary, and some therapists may offer reduced fees or sliding scale options. For example, certain clinics in New Jersey have income based slide scale per session, making therapy more accessible to a broader range of clients.

Factors Influencing the Cost

Several elements can affect the cost of couples therapy:

• Therapist's Credentials and Experience: Highly experienced therapists or those with specialized training may charge higher fees. For example, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist may have higher fee’s for Couples Therapy and Family Therapy to reflect their specialization.

• Session Length: Standard sessions typically last 45-50 minutes, but some therapists offer longer sessions, which can increase the cost.

• Location: Therapists practicing in urban areas or regions with a higher cost of living may have higher rates compared to those in rural areas.

• Insurance Coverage: Some therapists accept insurance which can significantly reduce out-of-pocket expenses. For example, clients with insurance might pay a copay ranging from $0 to $75 per session when seeing an in-network couples counselor. The cons of this is you may be limited to your choices of providers available to you.

  • If you have a high deductible, you may be paying more out of pocket before insurance will step in or copay applies. Health Savings Accounts (HSAs) and Flexible Spending Accounts (FSAs) are both tax-advantaged accounts that help you pay for medical expenses and many therapist accept this for payment which can help those with a high deductible.

    zencare.co

  • TIP: Investigate if your plan has out of network benefits. Using these benefits will allow you to choose a provider with greater flexibility and still get reimbursed a percentage of services, making cost lower.
    

Making Couples Therapy More Affordable

If cost is a concern, consider the following options:

• Sliding Scale Fees: Some therapists adjust their fees based on your financial situation or income.

• Insurance: Check if your health insurance plan covers couples therapy ( CPT Code 90847) and if the therapist accepts your insurance.

• Community Resources: Non-profit organizations or community mental health centers may offer affordable counseling services. Non-profit organization such as Open Path Collective offer online or in-person therapy with a vetted therapist at affordable costs.

• Therapist Interns: Sessions with therapy interns or provisionally licensed therapists can be more affordable while still providing quality care under supervision of licensed professional.

Investing in Your Relationship

While the cost of couples therapy can vary, many find it to be a worthwhile investment in their relationship's health and longevity. Improved communication, conflict resolution skills, and a deeper understanding of each other are invaluable benefits that can enhance your partnership.

If you're near Montclair, NJ, and considering couples therapy, Bridging Bonds: Couples Counseling & Psychotherapy offers both in-person and virtual sessions tailored to meet your unique needs. Rates start at $150 per session, providing accessible options for couples seeking support.

Remember, the right therapist can make a significant difference in your relationship journey. Take the time to research and find a professional who aligns with your goals and budget.

The 4 Big Mistakes Couples Make in Couples Therapy (And How to Avoid Them)

Couples Therapy can be an invaluable tool for couples, but there are several common mistakes that often prevent couples from getting the help they need when they need it. If you're navigating challenges in your relationship, it’s important to recognize these pitfalls and address them before they cause lasting damage.

1. Waiting Too Long to Seek Couples Counseling

Many couples wait until their issues have spiraled out of control before seeking couples therapy, often believing the problems will resolve themselves or that things will get better with time.  As unresolved issues linger, partners begin to emotionally withdraw, creating distance, weakening attachment and more deeply ingrained negative patterns become. Unresolved conflict, unmet emotional needs, and chronic misunderstandings accumulate. Over time, couples may start to feel like they’ve "grown apart," or that the issues are insurmountable.

Don’t wait for things to get worse. If you notice persistent patterns of disconnection, start therapy sooner rather than later. Early intervention helps preserve emotional bonds, improves communication, and allows partners to work through challenges while the relationship is still strong enough to recover. Addressing concerns early can save couples from larger issues down the road.

If the former is the case, it is essential to be prepared for the reality that couples therapy will be challenging. It will require daily commitment to working through difficult emotions and communication patterns. Self-care is vital in this process; each partner needs to maintain their wellbeing as they engage in marriage/couples counseling, to show up more fully for the relationship and work involved.

2. Having Different Therapy Goals

Couples therapy is most effective when both partners are aligned in their goals. However, if one partner is fully committed to improving the relationship while the other feels uncertain or ambivalent, progress can be slow. Studies show that 1 in 3 couples who enter therapy have significantly different expectations or goals for what they want to achieve (Journal of Marital and Family Therapy). 

When there’s a lack of shared goals, therapy can feel like a tug-of-war. It’s crucial to have open conversations about each person's goals and desires to ensure that both partners are working together toward a shared vision for their future. When there is disagreement on issues or ambivalence of whether to stay or leave, this doesn’t mean therapy shouldn’t be considered. It can be an ideal time to discuss shared values and work backward to create goals that reflect these common values.

In situations where one partner is unsure about wanting couples therapy and the couple is uncertain about their future—one partner may be leaning toward divorce, while the other wants to stay and work on the relationship—working with a therapist who specializes in or is trained in discernment counseling is an ideal option. Discernment counseling provides a structured space to explore these feelings and help both partners decide whether to move forward with therapy, separate, or divorce. Unlike traditional couples therapy, which focuses on improving the relationship, discernment counseling is specifically designed to clarify the couple’s options and commitment level before diving into deeper therapeutic work.

3. Believing One Person Has to Change in Couples Therapy

It’s common for one partner to feel that the other needs to change in order to fix the relationship. Some of this may be valid! However, this mindset can create a power imbalance and lead to frustration.  Instead of focusing on changing one person, couples therapy is to help both individuals understand their behaviors, patterns, and needs. By shifting the focus to mutual growth and teamwork, both partners can work together to create healthier communication and more effective problem-solving strategies, fostering a stronger, more collaborative relationship.  Successful couples therapy requires both partners to take responsibility for their part in the relationship dynamic. 

4. Not Being Fully Honest or Omitting Important Information
Omitting and avoiding difficult conversations and key information, such as infidelity, secrets, or unmet needs, can stall progress, create confusion, and send mixed messages in couples therapy. Without full transparency, the therapist can't provide accurate guidance, and partners may struggle to understand each other’s true feelings, leading to frustration and mistrust. If important details are discovered later, it’s likely to erode the progress that’s already been made, as the couple may have to revisit old wounds and rebuild trust from scratch. 

Honesty is essential for real long-term progress. Being open about all relevant issues allows the therapist to address the true problems and helps both partners move forward with clarity and trust.

If you're experiencing difficulties in your relationship, don't wait for things to get worse. By recognizing and avoiding these common mistakes, you can build a closer, more connected relationship with your partner.

Top Mental Health Resources in Montclair, NJ: Local Support Groups, Wellness Centers, and Community Services

Mental health support is crucial for a balanced and fulfilling life. Montclair, NJ, offers a variety of services to support individuals facing mental health challenges, whether you're seeking counseling, holistic wellness, or peer support. Here are the top mental health resources available to Montclair residents.

1. Bridging Bonds

Bridging Bonds offers compassionate, bilingual (English and Spanish) therapy services, specializing in individual therapy, couples counseling, and family therapy. Their expert therapists help clients manage issues like anxiety, depression, trauma, and relationship challenges. Using evidence-based methods like Emotion-Focused Therapy and the Gottman Method, they provide both in-person and virtual sessions to suit different needs.

Why it’s helpful:

• Tailored support for individuals, couples, and families.

• Expertise in crisis recovery and relationship issues.

• Convenient online and in-person options.

Location: 18-20 Lackawanna Plaza, Montclair, NJ
Website: bridging-bonds.com

2. Mental Health Association of Essex and Morris (MHAEM)

MHAEM offers peer-led support groups, workshops, and advocacy services for individuals with anxiety, depression, and other mental health concerns. They promote mental wellness through education and free/low-cost services.

Location: 33 South Fullerton Avenue, Montclair, NJ
Website: mhaessexmorris.org

3. COPE Center

The COPE Center provides individual counseling, substance abuse treatment, and family therapy, with a focus on young adults. They offer sliding scale fees for affordable care.

Location: 104 Bloomfield Avenue, Montclair, NJ
Website: oaksintcare.org/cope-center

4. Rooted Healing LLC

Rooted Healing, LLC recently opened a new location in Montclair, NJ, offering trauma and anxiety therapy with a focus on holistic healing. Their services include EMDR and Somatic Experiencing, designed to support long-term recovery from trauma. With both in-person and virtual sessions, Rooted Healing helps individuals work through anxiety, stress, and emotional pain by addressing the mind-body connection.

Address: 460 Bloomfield Avenue, Suite 209, Montclair, New Jersey 07042
Services: Trauma therapy, EMDR, Somatic Experiencing
Website: rootedhealingllc.com

5. Out Montclair

Out Montclair provides mental health support, social groups, and advocacy for LGBTQ+ individuals. They partner with local therapists to offer specialized care.

Location: Various venues in Montclair
Website: outmontclair.org

6. Family Service League (FSL)

FSL offers individual and family therapy, psychiatric evaluations, and school-based counseling, with a focus on children and adolescents. Multilingual services are available to support diverse populations.

Location: 204 Claremont Avenue, Montclair, NJ
Website: familyserviceleague.org

7. Adult School of Montclair – Mental Health Workshops & Education

Montclair Adult School provides several workshops focused on mental health and emotional well-being. These workshops are led by local mental health professionals and focus on topics like managing anxiety, depression, and building resilience.

Address: 100 Chestnut Street, Montclair, NJ 07042
Services: Mental health workshops, group support, community education
Website: https://asm.augusoft.net/

How to Choose the Right Mental Health Resource

Choosing the right mental health service depends on your needs. Bridging Bonds is ideal for those seeking therapy for personal development or relationship issues. If peer support is more your style, MHAEM offers excellent group options. For those open to holistic and Somatic methods, the Rooted Healing LLC is perfect for blending physical and mental health practices.

If you have any questions or need personalized mental health support, feel free to contact Bridging Bonds for expert guidance and care tailored to your needs.

Understanding the Unique Approach of Marriage and Family Therapy

When it comes to mental health and life satisfaction, traditional therapy often focuses on the individual. However, Marriage and Family Therapists (MFTs) offer a distinct perspective by emphasizing the interconnectedness of behaviors and relationships. This holistic approach can lead to deeper understanding and more lasting change, benefiting individuals, couples, and families alike.

What Sets Marriage and Family Therapist’s Apart?

MFT views mental health through the lens of relationships, recognizing that individual issues often intertwine with family dynamics, social contexts, and interpersonal connections. MFTs are trained to address not only relational patterns but also individual mental health concerns, ensuring a comprehensive approach to therapy.

The Benefits of Marriage and Family Therapist

1. Holistic Perspective: Marriage and Family Therapist’s considers the entire system, understanding that issues like anxiety and depression often stem from relational dynamics, while also addressing individual experiences and needs.

2. Strengthened Connections: Through therapy, couples and families can learn to communicate more effectively, resolve conflicts, and build stronger bonds, enhancing overall well-being.

3. Long-Term Solutions: By focusing on relationship patterns, Marriage and Family Therapist’s helps clients—whether individuals, couples, or families—develop skills that lead to sustained improvements in mental health and relational dynamics.

Individual Counseling and Couples Counseling within Marriage and Family Therapy

Marriage and family therapist’s provide tailored therapy for individuals, couples, and families. In individual therapy, they address personal mental health concerns while considering how these issues relate to broader relational contexts. For couples, marriage and family therapist’s facilitate effective communication and conflict resolution, helping partners strengthen their connection and navigate challenges together.

Why Choose a Marriage and Family Therapist ?

If you’re seeking therapy, consider the unique approach of Marriage and Family Therapy. An Marriage and Family Therapist can help you explore individual issues in the context of your relationships, whether you're dealing with personal challenges, navigating marital difficulties, or seeking to improve family dynamics. This comprehensive focus leads to profound insights and transformative change.


Marriage and Family Therapy provides a valuable alternative to traditional therapeutic methods. By understanding the interconnectedness of behaviors and relationships, Marriage and Family Therapy can help individuals, couples, and families achieve greater life satisfaction and emotional well-being.

If you’re interested in exploring this approach, reach out today to our dedicated Marriage and Family Therapist in Montclair, New Jersey for individual and couples counseling !

How Can I Cope and Heal from Infidelity? Understanding Emotional Distress and the Power of Support

Infidelity can leave deep emotional wounds. Whether you’ve just discovered a betrayal or have been trying to move forward for some time, the pain, confusion, anger outburst, intrusive thoughts, questions, sense of loss, and dips in mood can feel overwhelming. You might be asking yourself: What do I do now? How can I move forward? One of the most important steps is finding the right support system to help guide you through the emotional recovery process.

What Is the Trauma Response After Infidelity?

The trauma response after infidelity can show up emotionally and physically, often mirroring symptoms of PTSD or betrayal trauma. These responses are your body and mind’s way of trying to make sense of a deeply destabilizing experience.

Common emotional and physical symptoms include:

• Constant anxiety or panic

• Depressive thoughts or persistent sadness

• Obsessive thoughts, mental replaying of the betrayal, or intrusive images

• Difficulty sleeping or dreams about the infidelity

• Trouble focusing or mental fog

• Feelings of shame, anger, or low self-worth

• Emotional numbness or a sense of detachment

• Hypervigilance or constantly being on edge

• Fatigue or low energy

• Loss of motivation or difficulty initiating tasks

• Feeling physically drained or numb

Immediate Physical symptoms of trauma can vary from person to person but often include:

• Shaking hands or trembling due to emotional distress

• Loss of appetite or changes in eating habits

• Stomach discomfort, nausea, or gastrointestinal issues -It often occurs because trauma activates the sympathetic nervous system (the "fight or flight" response), which can disrupt digestion and lead to feelings of queasiness or stomach upset.

• Shivering or feeling cold- When the body is in a heightened state of stress, blood flow can be redirected away from extremities, leading to chills or cold sensations. These are part of the body’s physiological response to fear or emotional shock.

• Headaches or migraines

• Rapid heartbeat or chest tightness

• Dizziness or lightheadedness

• Shortness of breath

These reactions are valid—and common. When trust is shattered, your nervous system may remain on high alert. The sudden loss of trust, safety, and emotional stability are forms of psychological trauma.

Can Individual Therapy Can Help with Infidelity Recovery?

Individual therapy offers a safe, judgment-free space to process your emotions and begin rebuilding your sense of self. A therapist can help you:

• Understand your emotional responses and triggers

• Learn coping strategies to manage anxiety and intrusive thoughts

• Rebuild self-trust and self-worth

• Explore whether reconciliation or moving on is right for you

• Set boundaries and regain a sense of control

If you’ve been struggling with how to heal from infidelity, emotional support from a trained professional can be a lifeline.

How Important Is Emotional Support in Infidelity Recovery?

Emotional support plays a critical role in infidelity recovery. The betrayal of trust can trigger intense feelings of isolation, shame, anxiety, and self-doubt. Having a strong support system—whether that’s close friends, family, or working with a licensed therapist—can significantly ease emotional distress and help you regain a sense of control. Individual counseling provides a safe space to process emotions, explore your identity, and begin the mental health work needed for healing.

Support helps reduce the emotional burden by offering connection, perspective, and validation. A professional therapist trained in infidelity recovery and relationship trauma can help you understand your reactions, rebuild self-esteem, and guide you toward healthy coping strategies.

Not everyone has access to a supportive circle, but healing is still possible. If you're recovering alone, alternatives like individual counseling, support groups, self-guided journaling, podcasts, or educational reading can help you reconnect with your inner strength. These tools promote mental clarity, emotional resilience, and a renewed sense of purpose after betrayal.

No matter what path you choose, remember: healing is not something you have to do alone—and seeking emotional support is one of the most empowering steps in recovery.

Choosing support is an act of love. Reach out today and prioritize your healing and well-being.

At Bridging Bonds, we specialize in individual therapy and couples counseling for infidelity recovery in New Jersey and New York. Whether you're navigating separation, considering reconciliation, or just need space to heal, we’re here to support your next steps.

Reach out today for a free consultation and begin your journey toward clarity, peace, and emotional healing.