What Percentage of Couples Stay Together After Couples Therapy?

Couples therapy has long been a resource for partners looking to strengthen their relationships, improve communication, and resolve conflicts. But how effective is it? Do most couples actually stay together after therapy, or is it just a temporary fix?

If you’re considering couples counseling in New Jersey , New York or anywhere else, you might be wondering—what are the chances therapy will help us stay together?

Let’s break down the research, the factors that influence success, and what you can do to make couples therapy work for your relationship.

Success Rates of Couples Therapy

Studies show that couples therapy works for most people—but not all. The effectiveness depends on several factors, including the couple’s commitment, the therapist’s approach, and how early they seek help.

General Effectiveness of Couples Therapy

• About 70% of couples report significant improvements in their relationship after therapy.¹

• Roughly 38–50% of couples are still together four years after therapy. Even among those who separate, many still report better communication and greater understanding.²

• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) shows particularly strong results. Meta-analysis indicates a 70–75% success rate, with 90% of couples reporting measurable improvement.³

While not every couple stays together after therapy, most do experience better communication, fewer conflicts, and greater relationship satisfaction.

Why Do Some Couples Stay Together and Others Don’t?

Couples therapy isn’t a magic fix—it requires effort from both partners. The couples who stay together after therapy tend to have:

✅ A willingness to change – Both partners actively work on their relationship, not just expect the therapist to “fix” things.
✅ Commitment to the process – They attend sessions regularly and apply what they learn outside of therapy.
✅ A strong foundation – Even if things are rocky, couples who still respect and value each other have a better chance of staying together.
✅ Early intervention – The sooner couples seek help, the more likely therapy is to work.

On the other hand, therapy is less likely to work if:

❌ One or both partners are unwilling to change.
❌ There’s ongoing dishonesty, infidelity, or deep resentment.
❌ Therapy is a last resort after years of unresolved issues.

The reality is, some couples realize they are better apart. And that’s not always a failure—sometimes, therapy helps partners separate in a healthy way rather than in a painful, drawn-out battle.

The Importance of Early Intervention

Couples often wait too long to get help. On average, couples wait 2.68 years after noticing serious problems before starting therapy ⁴ . And by then, many habits are deeply ingrained.

Starting earlier allows partners to untangle patterns before resentment hardens. But some issues—like long-term emotional distance, frequent conflict, or broken trust—need more time and support.

In those cases, successful outcomes typically involve:

• Extended therapeutic engagement – Longer timelines to rebuild trust and healthy communication

• Consistent effort from both partners – Therapy only works if both people do

• Specialized approaches – Methods like EFT or the Gottman Method can be especially effective for deeper challenges

Early is better. But it’s never too late—as long as both people are willing to show up and do the work.

While early intervention is beneficial, it's crucial to recognize that some challenges require sustained effort and specialized approaches to overcome.

How to Make Couples Therapy Work for You

If you and your partner are considering therapy, here’s how to get the most out of it:

1. Be Open and Honest

Therapy only works if both partners are willing to be vulnerable and share their true feelings. Holding back or avoiding difficult conversations can prevent real progress.

2. Choose the Right Therapist

Not all therapists are the same. Look for someone who specializes in couples counseling and whose approach resonates with both of you. Some of the most effective methods include:

• Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) – Helps couples rebuild emotional connection.

• Gottman Method – Focuses on communication and conflict resolution.

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) – Helps couples change negative thought patterns.

3. Commit to the Process

Therapy isn’t a one-time fix—it requires consistent effort. This means:
✔ Attending sessions regularly.
✔ Doing any exercises or homework outside of therapy.
✔ Practicing new communication strategies daily.

4. Take Responsibility for Your Role

It’s easy to blame your partner, but therapy works best when both people acknowledge their part in the relationship dynamics.

5. Apply What You Learn

Therapy is not just about talking—it’s about learning skills that improve your relationship. Practice those skills in real life:
✔ Use active listening techniques.
✔ Try different conflict resolution strategies.
✔ Be intentional about reconnecting with your partner.

Final Thoughts: Does Couples Therapy Help Couples Stay Together?

Yes—for most couples, therapy improves their relationship. Studies show that a majority of couples who seek therapy experience positive changes, and many stay together long-term.

However, therapy isn’t about forcing a relationship to survive—it’s about helping partners make the best choice for their future. Some couples come out stronger than ever, while others separate in a way that’s healthier and less painful.

If you’re struggling in your relationship, seeking therapy sooner rather than later can make all the difference. Whether you want to work through challenges, improve communication, or reconnect with your partner, couples therapy can be a powerful tool for building a healthier, happier relationship.

Considering Couples Therapy in New Jersey?

At Bridging Bonds, we provide expert couples counseling near Montclair, NJ, helping partners strengthen their connection and navigate challenges together.

Sources:
¹ “Is It Time to Go to Couples Counseling?” The Gottman Institute, 27 Feb. 2020. www.gottman.com/blog/is-it-time-to-go-to-couples-counseling.
² Ibid.
³ Spengler, P. M., Lee, N. A., Wiebe, S. A., & Wittenborn, A. K. (2024). A comprehensive meta-analysis on the efficacy of emotionally focused couple therapy. Couple and Family Psychology: Research and Practice, 13(2), 81–99. https://doi.org/10.1037/cfp0000233

⁴ Doherty, W. J., Harris, S. M., Hall, E. L., & Hubbard, A. K. (2021). How long do people wait before seeking couples therapy? A research note. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 47(4), 882–890. https://doi.org/10.1111/jmft.12479